1. I knew I shouldn’t have put up that chicken post yesterday–not only was it a classic example of a First-World Problem, I went to PetSmart at lunch wearing my leather shoes and bought Toby a supply of cat food made of those same sad chickens. Let she who is without a captive cat cast the first stone against the chicken-eaters.

2. Speaking of being a hypocrite–I mean, speaking of complicated, multifaceted issues–there is scientific proof why cheese is so delicious: it contains trace amounts of morphine. Cheese really is dairy crack!

3. I don’t have room for it now and I won’t have a house by Christmas, but I found the tree I want someday. I’ll pretend I live in Whoville!